Soft Drink Friday is almost here...

Means nothing to you...means EVERYTHING to my kids - at least on Friday mornings. Don't even ask how it came to be because I have no recollection. It just is what it is.

:-)

So Last Week

I've been told it is way past time for a new post...Back to School was like soooo long ago.

But it isn't just Back to School that has me distracted from reading my favorite blogs and blogging myself...it's this whole new job thing. For the first time in, hmmmm, 7 or more years I am working full time. School schedule but still, pretty much full time. And, no kidding, this is the hardest work I've ever done. The best job I've ever had I think but also, the most tiring.

Could be that's because I don't know where to put my "stuff" when I get to work. Could be because I have to be there at 7:45 and that means I have to get up at 5:30 which means that...my late nights NEED TO BE a thing of the past (still working on that!) But it's awesome...I love it.

Then, with my oldest starting high school I have that totally on my mind and can think of nothing but that when I think of writing...and I really don't want to write about that anymore! Anyway...it has been a long and hectic couple of weeks but things are starting to settle down.

And here comes a nice long weekend. Me with a little mommy break...errands, some adult conversation (hopefully) and, YES!!!!!!!!!! sleeping in at least one morning! And, of course, some blogging.

What a perfect weekend.

:-)

Their Bags are Packed

And yeah, they are ready to go. One more excited than the other two about Back to School, but it's happening anyway.

Amazing that moving on to first grade seems as scary an adventure as does starting high school for each of my girls. But the lure of middle school and all that goes with it - cooler uniform shirts (if there is such a thing)...longer lunches...better lunches...buddies...girls (sigh) - makes tomorrow the day my son has been waiting for all summer. He's so ready.

And I start my new job. I'm thinking this year is going to be GREAT...I can't wait to be closer to my kids and, also, closer to what I want to be when I grow up.

Happy Back to School everyone...even if all you experience of it is getting stuck behind a slow-poke school bus on the way to work!

:-)

One Track Mind

I wish I could think of something else...anything else...to write about but almost the only thing on my mind is the teenager sleeping (or quietly watching MTV) upstairs.

In every conversation we have I fail to take the highest road. Usually I do take a pretty high road but, really, I should be taking one higher still. How else will she learn about self control, patience and boundaries?

Kat (my ultra-inspiring blogging friend) is taking the week off to focus on praying for her children during this crazy Back to School time. And although I don't intend on taking time off...especially since I just regained reliable internet access...I do intend on taking time to pray for my kids. I also intend on taking extra time to pray for myself and for my mothering skills. For my heart and where it currently stands on mothering this amazing teenage daughter whom God has entrusted in my care (and who am I to question that?). She's not mine actually...she's His. Someone reminded me of that not long ago. And I really really don't want to mess up one of His kids...at least not without knowing I've absolutely done the best that I can.

So, Prayer and Back to School. They definitely go together. Not just to start (or to remember to be) praying for kids but to pray for the scads of people who will influence them along their way. Especially their moms.

:-)

Angst

I've heard that word many times when someone struggles to describe the emotional world of a teenager. Let me point out that it applies just as perfectly to the upside down world of a mom desperately and clumsily trying to parent one of those teens.

Yes, I'm blogging (all about) me again. Sigh.

I'd heard of moms locking themselves in the bathroom to reign in anger, but had a hard time picturing myself doing it. Running away from your teenager...even if momentarily...seemed so ridiculous. But, oh my gosh, that was me just one hour ago.

Good thing I'd heard of the suggestion because there is no telling what I would have said (that I totally wished I hadn't come tomorrow morning) if I hadn't escaped to my bathroom.

So, it was either let another day pass by with no blog entry or blog about what life is really like for me. And since I really hate being a stranger, this is what you are getting. Plus, I'd really love if one of my local (lurking) readers would invite me over for a glass of wine. You think I'm kidding...totally not.

But don't get me wrong - life is very good. I know what I want to be, how I want to get there. I know what matters to me and what no longer does. I get that life is hard and that the messy stuff is what makes you real. I like that being real is much more fun than the stress that comes from being forced and plastic.

But...having a teenager, no - your teenager, looking at you and saying things you could swear you never ever said to your mother, makes even the most sure of us quake in our boots. (Yes, we wear boots in Florida...in January...while we drive down the street blasting our A/C.)

So "Angst" is something (probably the only thing) my freshman daughter and I have in common at the moment. What freaks me out a little is the thought that it could be the only thing we ever have in common. We seem like foreigners to each other. Aliens trying to survive in a world neither of us knows well. Wondering if we ever knew each other at all.

Anyway...recently, I found a box full of old college papers and books. Funny thing. I took a creative writing class my last semester and wrote of my teenage years whenever the assignment allowed. My writing was rough in (many) places but it was totally honest and so my papers weren't all that easy for me to read. But they did give me perspective and hope that, maybe, within 5 or 6 years, my daughter and I won't seem like such strangers to each other.

And that is my prayer. Along with a good glass of wine here and there...that is my constant prayer...that we will get through this and be better women because of it. You think?

Thanks guys for reading.

:-)

Starting Soon

It happened...the first meeting about getting the kids to raise money to build a well in Africa. We're really going to make it happen. We talked about Bulletin Boards, Well Buckets, Two Weeks of Sacrifice and why we are doing this. We have a plan and a start date - September 1.

For one year, September 1- September 1, the students are going to raise money for Blood:Water Mission. Some will go through the year barely noticing the bucket they are passing during Sunday School. But I'm thinking that, for a whole lot of others, something permanent will sink in and that by September 1, 2008, a lot of kids right here in the middle of Florida will be changed. It may just be a tiny seed planted in the mind of some...thinking of, doing for others. Or it could be bigger. Some could "get" that our tiny world right here at home is just that...tiny. Their goals and dreams could shift. They could decide that the life they thought they would go for after high school no longer matters. They could decide to live for helping those who can't help themselves - at least not all by themselves.

Okay, I know...I'm getting totally carried away. You guys know how I like to dream.

Anyway, we're ready. This time it's really going to happen.

:-)

No Internet :-(

Finally...I have internet. But it's been 5 days since my daily visits from the Internet/Cable Guys began. And, still, they have to come back for more tweaking. I think that means they are hoping whatever wires or splitters or boosters (those are just words I've heard cable guys use before) they leave me with will, once and for all, solve my problems. For now anyway.

So, for those of you who know me...can you imagine what 5 days without internet have been like for marianne? A temperamental modem makes for one very temperamental me.

But I've tried to fill my time productively. Let's see, since last Friday I've read 2 more Stuart Woods novels and another by Nora Roberts. What...you didn't expect me to be reading Shakespeare during my personal Internet Crisis, did you?

Also, when I ordered a new backpack from Lands End for the boy of the house, I had to use the phone. That was just weird.

So, here's hoping everything is all fixed very very soon and that the cable guy can find somewhere else to hang out for awhile.

:-)